In the mid 1920’s there was a song by Billy Rose, and Dave Dreyer called “Me And My Shadow” which reflected upon the closeness of one’s shadow as a constant companion wherever you might be. If I were to write a song with a similar thought I think I might entitle it “Me And My Ego”, for it seems that wherever I turn I am almost tripping over the presence of my ego, that part of me seeking attention, adulation and glory. I’m convinced that my ego does not always serve me well in the quest for deeper relationship with God. It seems, in fact, to get in the way.

The reality is my union with Jesus is less likely to occur if my ego remains large and my sense of self-interest is too great. There will not be enough space for the presence of God and the presence of me, and my ego. For union to occur I must surrender or deflate my ego in order to enter the space of God’s presence.

In the same way, it would seem that for God to enter my heart with all His fullness my ego, my self-interest and vanity, must relinquish the space to accommodate Him. It might be compared to two magnets trying to come together at their positively charged ends. The two positive ends will repel one another. But if one turns the negatively charged side of one magnet toward the positive end of the other they will come together. When I am faced with the all powerful, positively charged presence of God, the only way I can approach is from the negative or deficit end of myself. I keep attempting to approach God from my inflated, positively perceived ego, which actually repels the grace of God. My inflated ego and God’s glorious greatness cannot exist in the same space. I must embrace what I am not, my negative charge, to experience the magnetic pull toward God rather than being repelled by the opposing force of God. It is fascinating that God is drawn to me in my place of deficit and weakness, not so much to my positive accomplishments and strength.

In the Old Testament book of Exodus in the very last chapter, following the building of the Tabernacle it says “…Thus Moses finished the work. 34 Then the cloud covered the tent of meeting, and the glory of the Lord filled the tabernacle. 35 Moses was not able to enter the tent of meeting because the cloud had settled on it, and the glory of the Lord filled the tabernacle.”

It is an amazing thought that the space designated for God to fill could not be occupied by anything less than the presence of God. As the glory of the Lord filled the Tabernacle there was no room for Moses to enter, get in the way, or reserve space. It was “God space” which left little room for Moses, his ego, or agenda. The New Testament seems to indicate that the Lord now makes our hearts His Tabernacle. The problem is that I often still want to keep a closet or two, possibly a spare room reserved for myself, my wants, and my will. In the process of transformation God is continuing to remove those obstacles to His presence. At the root of most of those obstacles is my own ego and will. As I surrender to the Lord He is moving through and claiming more and more of the space of my heart until all space will eventually be available to Him to fill and occupy. When I come empty to the Lord He gladly fills me with His own presence and power. If I come full of myself, I will find there is little room for Him. As you consider your day, what might be the opportunity to set your ego aside in humility and receive the greater joy of the fullness God gives? May this day be filled with His presence, especially in the Tabernacle of your heart.